


3 AM

by marblehead



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, I rewrote this because the other one is embarrassing, I’m no longer new to the fandom so here’s an in character rewrite :), Rewrite, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:21:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24864478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marblehead/pseuds/marblehead
Summary: When he’s had a rough day, Zim usually sits in the cold, alone. But tonight, he doesn’t want to be alone.(rewrite of “i’m exhausted and having a mental breakdown on the kitchen floor")
Relationships: Dib & Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 55





	3 AM

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!!
> 
> Here’s something I’ve been meaning to do for a while. It’s more in character and detailed, and has a full story arc. Also, now with also more words!!
> 
> You can still read the original on my page.
> 
> Enjoy :)

The darkness was suffocating Zim.

Not that he wasn’t always suffocating. He knew he had been doomed to be smothered from the moment he was sent to Earth. This disgusting, god-forsaken planet always seemed to threaten to choke Zim every time he set foot outside, right up until he got home.

Home? This hopeless, disgusting planet? Home?!

He could laugh.

He almost did.

Zim was cold, empty, and lonely. The darkness pressed up against his tiny body and sent shivers up his spine; it made his skin crawl with the emptiness and tension it brought. It crept up to his face and covered his mouth so he couldn’t scream. As the darkness consumed him, his senses became muffled; nothing was clear anymore. That’s what the darkness did. It stalked him. The more he thought about it, the more “there” the darkness felt. Even when it was day and earth’s sun beat down onto him, he always felt it there. Especially when it got late into the night. At least in the day, he could go outside and feel warmth. But at night, the cold closed in and consumed him, reminded him of how alone he really was, and made him forget who he was or where he came from.

But, then, maybe that was a good thing.

He could feel the lump in his throat growing; it made him feel like he was going to be sick. Today had dealt him a particularly bad hand; his report to the Tallest earlier was rocky at best and a nightmare at worst. Not only had he had nothing much to report, they were far nastier to him than usual. He’d managed to keep his front together the entire time, and he had had no plan of letting it break down. But, as usual, things didn’t go according to plan. Zim could feel his mask crumbling to bits.

The tile floor of the kitchen was hard and uncomfortable, and the wall he leaned up against was cold against his skin. Zim’s lekku twitch. This wasn’t the ideal place to let his emotions get the best of him, but he could care less now. Did it even really matter? No one was around to see him.

A quiet, unfamiliar noise comes from the living room. Zim almost jumps, but quickly recognizes the sound as Gir snoring. Craning his neck, he sees the robot laying down on the couch, cuddled up in his onesie. He had fallen asleep.

Good. He shouldn’t see Zim like this.

The alien boy shivers, slouching down onto the floor and hugging himself tightly. He probably looked absolutely pathetic. He was supposed to be an invader, after all! Even if it was a fake mission, and he wasn’t even coded as an invader, and his entire race hated him simply for existing. Sure it was the truth, but thinking too much about it was overwhelming. Why did he have to mess up so much? He probably deserved the treatment he was getting, right? If he messed up so naturally all the time, he must be one big failure of an Irken.

Look at that, he was even getting emotional! He couldn’t even help it. Tallest, how defective was he?

It was simply a fact Zim could never be normal. It weighed on Zim every day. As it got later and later on nights like this one, the weight would grow heavier and heavier. It was a lump in his throat, a hole in the pit of his squeedlyspooch, a pounding in his chest that was screaming at him how _horrible_ he was. He wanted to be better than this. He _could_ be better than this. But despite his mind screaming at him to stop embarrassing himself, his pak always made him do and say things he didn’t want to.

Curse this brain.

Curse this code.

Some movement comes from the ceiling above him. His eyes find their way up somehow, and he looks just in time to see a hole opening up. A small device falls out, clattering onto the tile floor next to him. The hole closes back up. Zim glances around, confused, before hesitantly reaching out a gloved hand and grabbing it. It was a human telephone thingie, and it was turned on. The screen was pulled up to a contact with no photo, simply labeled “the human”. Who had done this? Was this some kind of sick joke?

Zim could have done something about it, knowing an intruder had likely broken into his base and decided to pull a prank on him in his most vulnerable moment. But instead, Zim chose to stay laying on the floor. With a bit of effort, he rolls over, clutching the phone tightly. He found himself staring at the Dib’s contact. He found himself contemplating whether to press the call button. He found himself finding the will to press it. What for? Help?

He _never_ considered asking the human for help! But maybe he could prove of some use to him in this specific situation! He could get better and go back to normal (whatever that meant for him)! Knowing the Dib-human, he wouldn’t even help him, so what was the harm in trying? Either way, Zim would get something he wanted!

A disgusting, smelly, filthy human. He hated Dib. So much. He hated Dib so much he just wanted to scream at him for hours about how much he hated him. He hated Dib so much that he wanted to grab hold of the front of his shirt and cry into his shoulder. He hated him so much he just wanted to tell him everything and hear Dib make fun of him for it, so maybe he could see how ridiculous he was being. But Dib would never let Zim anywhere near him no matter how much Zim needed him or how close they were. Sure they played video games sometimes and sure! Sometimes Zim let Dib win! And _sure!_ Maybe they had a good time taking a break from physically beating each other up once in a while! None of that mattered though! Dib was a human, and humans were the _enemy!_ If Dib saw him now, that would mean being vulnerable in front of his mortal enemy! So easily defeated!

But, did it really matter?

He felt so tired anyway. So defeated.

Zim made a small whimpering noise that was louder than he’d expected. His free hand flew over his mouth as his eyes widened. He looked through the doorway of the kitchen to the living room. Gir was still sound asleep on the couch. No other movements or noises went through the house. Good, this was good. He couldn’t let anyone see him this bad; it hadn’t been like this in a while. Knowing everyone hated him was fine, he’d manage fine alone. He’d bundle up in a blanket with some hot chocolate and watch a movie or something. He wanted to do that, more than anything. To move from the dark kitchen into the bright living room, where he would be okay. But something didn’t let him.

He needed to call the Dib. This is what he wanted.

He hits the call button on the phone. Zim felt his heart thumping a little harder in his chest.

Someone picks up the phone. There’s some shuffling over the speaker.

“Zim, what the hell, it’s 3 in the morning.” Dib mumbled. Zim purses his lips at Dib’s familiar voice, feeling the lump in his throat return. His antennae drooped down as the gravity of the situation began to seep in. Zim squeezes his eyes shut.

“Dib-thing,” He simply says. His voice is more stable than he thought it would be. Good. “Zim demands that you talk to him.”

There’s a long awkward silence between the two. Zim hears Dib take a long inhale and clear his throat nervously. “What do you mean ‘talk to you’?”

Zim’s frustration grows. He knew Dib couldn’t read his mind, but the fact he just _didn’t understand_ frustrated him beyond all measure. “I mean what I said, pig-smelly! Talk to Zim!” Zim could only muster up the strength to finish the first sentence, as his voice cracks on his own name. He shakes his head, feeling tears pooling at the corners of his eyes. He blinks them away. Not yet.

“You’re always so confusing and cryptic, I don’t know what you want from me! What are you planning?!” Dib demanded. Zim bites his lip. There’s another long silence between the two; Zim can hear Dib’s quiet breathing on the other side of the phone. What does he say? Why did he call Dib in the first place? The whole situation was almost hilarious, and Zim would have laughed or made it into a joke or introduced it as his next big evil plan, but he knew he was too far into it now to play it off as such.

Zim suddenly realized that the silence between the two had gone on too long, but before he could speak, Dib beat him to breaking the silence.

“Zim, are you there? Are you tracking my location or something?” The human laughed nervously. Zim shakes his head, despite knowing that Dib can’t see him.

“I’m not tracking you right now, Dib.” Oh Tallest, he sounded pathetic.

“Uhm,” The human started, taking a deep breath,”So why did you call me?”

There was yet _another_ silence between the two. Zim was tired of these silences! He sat in the quiet for so long, and he called Dib to help him! Not to just sit awkwardly for so long without speaking! He grumbles in frustration, but the grumble ends up coming out as another whimper. Zim swallows hard, feeling tears finally running down his face.

“No one likes Zim!” The alien snaps, surprising both him and Dib at how his voice shook with the words. Zim didn’t wait for a response, his breath hitching as he began to ramble.

“The Tallest were _horrible_ to Zim! I lost the respect of my Tallest the moment they sent me to this _dirt planet_ to conquer it! Zim is only here to be a play-thing for the humans! This horrible, filthy planet only wants me to suffer! All the humans only want me to suffer! And… and _you _, Dib! You’re the worst human of them all!” Zim desperately wanted to stop talking, but continued, drawing closer and closer to a breaking point. “You make me hurt like no other human has made me hurt! I want to destroy you! I want to grab you and never let go! I want you to be with me forever but you always run away after we fight and _Zim hates you for hurting him like this!_ I hate you so, so much, Dib!”__

__Zim bursts into a fit of sobs, sniffling and whimpering as he tries desperately to wipe his tears away. What a pathetic, disgusting sight. What a sad excuse for an Irken invader. For a while, Dib doesn’t say anything, and at one point, Zim checks to make sure he’s still on the phone and hasn’t hung up on him. Eventually, Zim starts to calm down, taking deep breaths. He assumes Dib was waiting for this, as he hears the human on the other side of the phone finally speak._ _

__“Zim, I don’t think no one likes you.” He admits. Zim widens his eyes, so baffled that he stops crying. “I don’t think Gir hates you. And, uh, I don’t hate you either.”_ _

__“Lies! You only lie to Zim!” He sits himself up, leaning back up straight against the wall. “That’s all anyone can do, is lie and hurt Zim! Why does everything want to hurt Zim?!” Zim demands. A tense silence following as he awaits a response. The human does respond after a while, but slowly and with a gentle tone in his voice._ _

__“Listen, Zim,” The human starts. There’s some shuffling on the other end, and Zim assumes that he’s sitting up. “I’m gonna grab my switch and some hot chocolate and come over, okay?”_ _

__Zim considers the words. On one hand, this Dib would be in his base. But..._ _

__Whatever._ _

__“Okay.” He takes the phone from his ear (?) and hangs up, not allowing Dib to get another word in. Okay. Okay. He said okay. He should unlock the front door, then. He stands shakily, slowly making his way into the living room. Gir was sitting up, staring at him as he walked past and unlocked the front door. The alien turns. He doesn’t cross his arms or furrow his brow. Instead, he walks over and sits next to Gir. The tiny robot gazes up at his master, bright blue eyes wide._ _

__“Friends is comin’ over??” Gir asks. Zim simply nods. Gir hums, grinning and turning on the TV to something happy. Usually Zim would be upset, but this time he just sighs and leans back into the couch cushions. He doesn’t notice how Gir looks back, confused._ _

__________ _

__About half an hour later, there’s a knock at the door._ _

__Zim slowly turns to the door, exhausted and bleary eyed. He wipes his eyes, groaning as he gets up from the couch and stumbles to the door. He unlocked it for a reason. But, whatever._ _

__Dib stands in the doorway, a worried look on his face that melted into one of relief as he saw Zim was no longer crying. In each hand Dib held a hot chocolate, and across his shoulder was a bag, which Zim assumed held his switch._ _

__“Hey, Zim.” The human smiles sadly._ _

__Zim takes a few steps forward, simply pressing his forehead against the other’s chest. Both himself and Dib were surprised at what he said next._ _

__“Thank you, human.”_ _


End file.
